Once upon a time...I hated ENGLISH !!

(The names of some of the characters in this post have been changed to protect privacy :-) )

One of my colleagues saw my handwriting and exclaimed in surprise, “Aren’t girls supposed to have beautiful handwriting?” The notions that a guy has in his head about girls can be weirdly endless. I didn’t react to that comment as only I knew the story behind my handwriting.

There was a time when the English language was my worst enemy. Little did I know back then, that there is more nastiness left to be experienced in this world than the trivial issues I faced during my school years with the academic subject called English.

I had to change schools after my 2nd grade. The new school was one step ahead in everything is what I felt. All the students had already transitioned into the cursive style of writing. I had just joined the 3rd grade and my handwriting was still more of block or printed writing. Back in my old school, I often used to get a gold star(s) on my notebook from all my teachers for my handwriting. All of that was about to change.

Daisy ma’am appeared to be a sweet class teacher to me at first. She did notice my block writing style and she told me that I can gradually make the transition to cursive writing and that there is no hurry. Like any other 9-year-old kid, I believed her completely.

One fine day, Daisy Ma’am seemed to have had a bad day, either personally or with work. She was snapping at everyone at any error that came her way. She was correcting our notebooks and while doing so, she opened my notebook. I think my handwriting irked her quite a bit and she called out my name and sternly told me that from tomorrow onwards, I had to adopt the cursive writing style. On hearing this, I felt lost for quite a while. As I was at my obedient best in those days, the very next day, I changed the way I wrote English. Frankly, my English began to look like Arabic!! I used to join the letters in any way I could so that they would not look like block writing. And the end result was an absolute disaster. The beautiful handwriting I once had was there no more.

Daisy Ma’am never commented on my change of handwriting and so I thought she was satisfied with what I had done. This change alarmed my mother a lot and she was sad to see the ugly transition. 3rd grade passed by and so did 4th grade. Except for occasional comments from teachers that my handwriting is not legible, I did not bother to change my handwriting and the teachers didn’t seem to care much as long as I had content in what I wrote. I also scored quite decently in the subject.

It was in my 5th grade, that I found the English subject had become a notch tougher than what I had come across so far. My performance started to degrade very gradually and so did my handwriting. To make things worse, my English teacher, Freya Ma’am had an immediate aversion to me or my handwriting – I was not sure. She used to decrease 4 to 5 marks for handwriting alone, that too only for me in class. I felt a wave of discrimination hit me. During that academic year, one of the English exams was tough and I had never expected to fail in the subject. When I got my paper, I realised that I had lost 5 marks for bad handwriting alone!! If I had got those 5 marks, I would have passed the exam easily.

Being the naïve and timid girl that I was back then, it took me a lot of time to muster up the courage to walk up to Freya Ma’am and defend my case. I felt it was unfair for me to lose marks like this as I knew I was not that weak in English, it had to be something else and I knew that my handwriting would be one of the reasons. All she told me was that I had to improve and when I asked how I could go about doing the same, she had no tips to offer me. I felt terribly dejected and a rebel inside me began to grow.

Mummy had to struggle to get me to study English as I thought that there was no use in taking that subject seriously. Vinita who was one of my close friends back then in school shared a few tips on how to write more legibly and that helped me a lot. However, there was no element of beauty in my handwriting. 5th grade passed by somehow but unfortunately, my attitude towards the English subject did not change.

To my disappointment, I discovered that Freya Ma’am yet again was my English teacher in the 6th grade and with that, I concluded that year's academic performance in English. It was during this year (1995) that I joined the school athletic team and was termed as a ‘promising athlete'. I enjoyed that fame a lot that year, surprising and stunning my opponents and friends with my performance. During these days, I often had to miss many classes to spend time to practice for my athletic events during school hours. I used to rejoice whenever I used to miss the English class.

After the summer break, we were informed that Freya Ma’am had resigned and a new teacher was going to take the English class. Although I did heave a sigh of relief, I did not expect much of my interest towards the English language to change. Madhu Ma’am was the new English teacher. She was a very pleasant lady and soon became every student's favourite teacher. Unfortunately, all this did not change my attitude towards learning English.

One day, as usual, after the practice I stepped into an ongoing English class. Madhu ma’am smiled at me and asked, "Maria, how was your practice session today?” I was completely taken by surprise and mumbled “Practice session was good”. For the sake of those people who think I am a chatterbox now, I would like to let you know that back then, I was an introvert and a person of few words.

Also back then, students participating in sports were considered to be poor academic performers. My coach used to tell me that I was an exception in this regard but some teachers expressed subtle dislike towards me because I participated in athletics which left me bewildered many a time. Madhu ma’am and her interest in my extra-curricular activities was heartwarming. I gradually started looking forward to these moments and in turn my attitude towards her subject also gradually changed.

Oral recitation in front of the class had always been a nightmare back then. I could never open up my mouth even to ask a question in class. Madhu ma’am noticed this sort of stage fright that I had and often calmed me down whenever I blanked out in between recitations. A few snickering students used to get me nervous but Madhu ma’am never followed their cue and often gave me a second chance and I used to finish off the recitation somehow and make a run for my seat.

My mother noticed that my marks in English had improved a lot and was very happy to observe this change. But the best was yet to come. The results of the final exam were announced and I scored a whopping 93 which also happened to be the highest score in the entire sixth grade. Two other students also scored the same. Every year the school awards the toppers of every subject in every grade and only one topper in each subject would be awarded. To my joy, I found out that I was selected out of the three who scored the same as I was the only one out of the three who was active in extra-curricular as well as academics.

My mother was stunned beyond words as to how an ‘English’ rebel like me managed to achieve this. The year 1995 was a year of ‘highs’. I am extremely grateful to Madhu ma’am for bringing about a change in my attitude and for proving gracefully that a little ‘Love and Care’ is all that takes to conquer or overcome anything!

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